The Value of Cooperation
Learning to get along with others is one of the most important tasks of life. It is the key to an effective witness to a lost world.
Our world is filled with conflict. Every day we hear the news of another outbreak of violence somewhere around the world. People are in conflict with one another. Nations are at war with each other. Even families are being torn apart by internal strife and conflict.
Conflict is one of the greatest problems in the Christian church today. Believers cannot get along with each other. People are becoming divided over the most petty things. Some are upset with the music. Others don't like the color of the new carpet. Some are bothered by the deacons. Still others are angry with the pastor. All this is an indication of immaturity and carnality. It certainly is not of God.
When divisiveness grips a congregation, a church cannot experience the power and blessing of God. In my years in the ministry, I have witnessed the tragic destruction of many a church because people simply could not get along with each other. When that happens the devil has a field day, and the cause of Christ suffers.
Conflict also tears families apart. It divides husbands from wives, parents from children. It feeds on bitterness and produces rebellion. In the end it can lead to wife abuse, child abuse, teen-age runaways, divorce, and even murder.
God's ways are love, joy, peace, and patience. When we are filled with the Holy Spirit we will produce these qualities. When we are not, conflict will always result.
Causes of Conflict. The ultimate cause of all personal conflicts is sin. Whether the sin is selfishness, bitterness, greed, or anger, it feeds sinful attitudes and sinful behavior.
Sinful actions always produce conflict. Selfishness feeds greed and anger. Bitterness produces jealousy and contempt. One sin leads to another, and soon your life becomes cluttered with sin.
Sin complicates life. The consequences of sin complicate life terribly. Sin can result in divorce, loss of a job, illegitimate pregnancy, suicide, murder, imprisonment - the list is endless. It always leaves life in a mess. Sometimes the mess can be cleared up fairly easily, but sometimes you have to live the rest of your life with the consequences.
Resolving conflict. Solving conflicts involves decision making. You must decide that you want to resolve the conflict. Problems don't just go away by themselves. You must decide to take corrective actions to resolve and eliminate conflicts. Learn to tackle every problem God's way. This means understanding and putting into practice His principles for human cooperation.
Don't be satisfied with feeble, halfhearted efforts. Give it all you have and God will bless you for it. Don't wait for the other person to come to you. Go to him first. Take the right step. Make the first move. You will be glad you did. Try these steps first:
Acknowledge the conflict. Stop pretending nothing is wrong. Admit it to yourself first, then to the one with whom you are in conflict.
Admit your responsibility. If you are part of the conflict, you are part of the solution. Be honest. Confess your faults before you ask someone else to confess his.
Ask forgiveness. Don't assume you will be forgiven. Ask for it. Don't make excuses. Admit your part in the conflict and ask forgiveness for the wrong you have done.
Grant forgiveness. If the other person forgives you and asks you to forgive him, do it. Be willing to give to another what you are asking for yourself.
Make reconciliation. Forgiving each other is not enough. You must be reconciled to one another. Forgive and forget. Bury the past and begin to build a better relationship for the future.
The joy of fellowship. One of the great blessings of the Christian life is fellowship with other believers, building spiritual friendships with those in whom Christ lives. Genuine fellowship can occur only between true believers who are indwelt by the Spirit of God.
The biblical term for fellowship is the Greek word Koinonia, meaning "to have in common." Fellowship occurs between those who have a relationship based on commonality. For Christians this should be automatic, since we all have Christ in common. When He is in control of our lives there is no conflict.
The night before Jesus went to the Cross, He prayed for His disciples, That they all may be one; as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee, that they also may be one in us (John 17:21). Then our Lord added the powerful and convicting statement, That the world may believe that thou has sent me. Our fellowship and cooperation is essential as a testimony to a lost world. People will never believe that we know God if we cannot get along with one another.
Lack of unity and cooperation is the greatest hindrance to the spread of the gospel in the world today. We cannot win the world to Christ while we are fighting among ourselves. Yet, the Christian church is more divided and segmented today than ever. May God help us to learn what true Christian unity and fellowship are all about.
The necessity of cooperation. The local church is a spiritual family. Therefore, it must function as a family. Each of us has a place of service and responsibility. To be truly effective, and to accomplish the ministry to which we have been called, we must learn to cooperate with one another.
In his instructions to the church of Galatia, the apostle Paul wrote, Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted (Galatians 6:1). This is the great task of the church. We are to encourage the faint-hearted, and we dare not become judgmental in the process!
God has entrusted a ministry of reconciliation to us. As we preach the gospel to the unsaved, we are to urge them to be reconciled to Christ. God has also given us a ministry of restoration. We are to rebuke, correct, and restore fellow believers who fall into sin. Ours is not a task of condemnation, but one of hope and help.
If the church is to reconcile and restore, how much more do individuals and families need to do the same. We need to learn how to get along with each other to the glory of God. You have God in your soul, Christ in your heart, the Holy Spirit in your life. There is no excuse for disunity and conflict in the Christian life. Nor is there any excuse for conflict in our churches or homes. Where Christ is in control, He produces peace, not conflict. He gives us joy, not sadness, love, not hatred. He is sufficient to meet our every need.
When you allow Christ to control your life He will help you overcome conflicts. When you submit to Christ, He will produce meekness and gentleness in your life. As the source of peace and unity, He is the opposite of selfishness and arrogance. When He controls you, you will be able to control yourself. When He controls your family, petty arguments and conflicts will disappear.
Nearly one million marriages end in divorce every year in America. That is one of our great national tragedies. Divorce is tearing the fabric of our society apart. It has even become a serious problem in many of our churches. But it does not have to be that way. Jesus said that people get divorced because of the hardness of your hearts (Matthew 19:8). This should never be the case with spirit-filled believers.
Christians are the light of the world and the salt of the earth. But we cannot be very effective if our light has gone out and our salt has lost its flavor. We cannot hope to change the world until we change ourselves.
Getting along with others is a way of life. At times it involves denying ourselves and "turning the other cheek." Other times it involves the development of positive spiritual qualities in our lives. Whichever the case may be, you are the key to your ability to get along with others. Stop making excuses. Stop blaming someone else. You are the one who can make a difference by letting God control your life.
You can learn to get along with others. The more you do it, the more you will enjoy it. In fact, you will come to enjoy life itself in a new and fresh way. May it be said of Christians today, as it was in ancient times, "Behold, how they love one another!"